Shopping with Small Children

Nothing like small children to give you a new shopping experience. Let me set up the scene. It’s raining, the kids are fussy, mom is going crazy. I pack the kids into the car and head off to Walmart. I will be looking to buy bras, socks and underwear. To stray from the main story – due to breastfeeding and pregnancy, I have not bought any new undergarments in 3 years. And after having children, the old stuff doesn’t quite fit right. Well, except for the socks and those are just so old I need new ones. And something about my Husband getting tired of me wearing his socks.

Back to the story, I get to Walmart with #2 Son asleep and #1 Son ready to bounce out of the car. Luckily, I find a parking spot close to the front. We won’t get too wet. I get #1 Son down and get #2 Son out. #2 Son is dead weight. All 30 pounds. Nothing is going to wake him up. Sigh. We get into the store. #1 Son wants in the basket. Ok, while holding #2 Son, I use my free arm to lift my 40 pound son into the basket. I thought I was going to break something. Now I’m pushing #1 Son while holding #2 Son and thinking, I have to be totally insane.

Here’s the good part. I get to the bras and start looking for my size. My #1 Son in a VERY loud voice points to one of the boxes and says “Mommy’s Boobies”. Not just once. But at least 4 times before I could get him to shut up. Ahhh. My arm is about to break off from holding #2 Son and I am embarrassed from #1 Son’s comments. Which don’t stop, they just get quieter. There is nothing I can do but go shop for something else. I decide to skip the underwear and just go get socks. (we won't discuss were he learned that phrase - but it wasn't me!)

After getting socks, I go look for raincoats for my sons. I pass a kid’s display of sunglasses. My son wants some. Ok, it’s good for him. I may hate Winnie the Pooh, but I’ll let him have the sunglasses. He picks out a nice black frame with dark lenses and Tigger on it. Off we go. I can’t find the cool rain coats (like you see with hat, coat and matching galoshes) but I find something that is a little to big for him but will work. Nothing small enough for #2 Son. Now we head over to shoes. Just to see if they have galoshes. Nope, no galoshes. Let’s go.

#1 Son says he has lost his sunglasses. Sure enough, they are not in the cart. Back to the kid’s display. Here is another good part. He points to the RED sunglasses with Pooh on them and says he wants those. Hmmmm. I don’t care, but I think Dad might have an issue with this. So I put them on him and say – “Nope, can’t have those. They have red lenses, we need black lenses.” Phew. He points to another pair. You guessed it – Purple. They have dark lenses. I’m starting to sweat this one. We put them on and … They are too small!!!! Phew. Made it through another pair. But then #1 Son starts saying we could get them for #2 Son. Nope, nope. #2 Son can pick out his own later. I had #1 Son a pair with Pooh, that is blue frames with dark lenses. YAAAAAAAAAAAAA. He likes them. Another close call.

And this is only a small part of the story. I’m leaving out the Thomas the Tank Engine DVDs, the batteries and few other things that happened along the way. All in under an hour. Can you say “L.O.N.G. D.A.Y.”? Repeat. I thought the day would never end. But it did and today is another day of fun. Can’t wait to see what they get into today.