Wednesday, November 23, 2005

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Life Reflections

· If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.

· Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

· Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he'll be a mile away - and barefoot.

· Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic.

· Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

· A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

· A closed mouth gathers no feet.

· If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

· My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

· I have found at my age going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of my face.

· If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

· Always yield to temptation, because it may not pass your way again.

· Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

· A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

· Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

· Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

· No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

8 comments:

pam said...

These are good... and best of all take my mind off my cold... ;)

Richmond said...

Oooooh good ones!

PrimoDonna said...

I love 'em! Where do you find all this good stuff?!!

Ogre's Politics & Views said...

Fun Stuff

Time to start the long holiday weekend.

Ogre's Politics & Views said...

Fun Stuff

Time to start the long holiday weekend.

triticale said...

Actually, there is a case on record of a married man being shot, while doing dishes, by a hitman hired by an organized crime group trying to muscle into his business.

Unityflow said...

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. - It's funny 'cause it's true.

lisa said...

I hope you get in touch I have read about the sitution but ave gone on about it for years . my personel just le me know lis